“I think everyone’s bisexual to some degree or another; it’s just a question of whether or not you choose to recognize it and embrace it. Personally, I think choosing between men and women is like choosing between cake and ice cream. You’d be daft not to try both when there are so many different flavours.”—Björk
Whenever I get self-conscious of myself/body, I always imagine a giant probably around 10 average humans tall picking up little humans and eating them or flinging them effortlessly across a few houses. We are so insignificant in the big scheme of things. I keep thinking, live this short life happy and without regret, and if you feel like changing the world then do it.
Just something I was thinking about as I was driving back from the gym. And guys, you don’t need to grunt every time you do a rep to express your manliness.
Today I got up, ate leftovers, got myself a toffee nut latte, and sat at the park reading. It was kind of weird, just reading and having the wind and the trees just existing.
Then I went to goodwill and bought some pants so I could make some shorts. Because I find it extremely hard to find the perfect pair of shorts anywhere unless I go to Hollister/abercrombie (which will probably run at about $30-$40 each pair) so… problem solved.
I like being by myself a lot. I don’t have to worry about making sure other people are having fun or being engaged either listening or participating in a conversation, laughing when it is appropriate, sitting properly. I can take up a whole bench or table, and the only time I need to smile is when I see a kid fall on the floor.
I find it a little sad that they exist almost exclusive from each other sometimes. Think about it, your closest friends can be counted on one hand. What about that one girl you are acquaintances with and has this great personality and similar interests, but she has her own 3 closest friends to be with? This is where I question fate. Is it just going to take more effort to reach out to people who would’ve otherwise not had any inkling of a desire to see you after high school?
At times I feel extremely overwhelmed by the choices I have, dumbfounded and scared. But that’s the beauty of life, isn’t it?
Conscious of the moles on my face for some reason. They honestly don’t bother me at all 364 days of the year, but at times I take a good look at my face and think … oh there are a few little noncancerous skin growths speckled around.
Here’s a fun little story. Generally speaking, the ideal Asian beauty is a perfect oval, pale face with nice eyebrows, small mouth/nose, big eyes, no flaws. The eyelid thing is up for debate. As I was in China last summer, one of my kid relatives had the nerve to go up to my face, and exclaim “Gee, you have sooooo many moles on your face” and proceed to point and count each one. My soul “Ow..ow..ow…ow……” My face =_________=
He was also the same kid who said to me,”Hey, you’re going to get married and have kids one day huh?” smiling all the while.
No, I really wouldn’t appreciate you looking through my sketchbook.
No, my eyes are naturally shaped to make me look angry and/or tired.
No, I didn’t mean to say it in that tone or intend sarcasm.
My toes are actually that long.
Children are cute, from a distance.
I can’t express myself the way I want to. Probably because I’m too self-conscious, awkward, unsure, shy, quiet by nature, and most of all…. afraid of what might happen if I ever did go through with it.
Meanwhile, I am enjoying the new lipstick. Kudos to me looking even older, ha.